Mess is more than just the stuff other people see on the outside.
I help people eliminate the mess that creates stress, BUT before I was a professional organizer I was an over scheduled, overwhelmed, slightly stressed out mama. That’s why I am so empathetic when I work with my organizing clients; I get it because I’ve been in there.
Here an example of how mess creates stress: This is me eating cake for breakfast while feeding the baby and probably listening to someone else’s drama but really thinking about all the homework I still needed to do (I was studying to be teacher at the time)… Too much!
The house was a mess even though I felt like I was always cleaning. I would forget about appointments even though I was always looking at my calendar. I was tired even though I went to bed early each night.
Mess creates stress, and I knew there had to be a better way!
I’m going to share with you how I cleaned up my messy stress. I didn’t worry about what I should start doing. I focused on what I wanted to STOP doing. Here are the 4 things you can stop doing right now If you’re ready to begin your decluttering, de-stressing, simplifying journey.
Moms tend to be talented jugglers. We always have lots of balls in the air at once. We are proud of this amazing talent because we believe we are accomplishing so much more than other people who can only do one thing at a time, right? Guess what. It’s not true. Research suggests that multitasking can be less efficient and only create unnecessary busywork.
Multitasking tends to create unfinished projects, and unfinished projects only create more clutter. Piles of partially opened mail, unwashed dishes and mountains of laundry actually disappear more quickly when we focus on completing one task at a time. I know it sounds counterintuitive, but you gotta slow down in order to speed up.
Doing It ALL Alone
Sister, you gotta ask for help. We expect so much of ourselves, but we need to be kind to ourselves and get help.
Make a list of all your responsibilities. If you’re just going through the motions so that you can make it through the day without collapsing, you need to reevaluate your responsibilities. I can almost guarantee you that you are doing too much. You may be shocked at how long your list of responsibilities is. I sure was! I had to ask myself, “Why am I the only one doing all this crap?” and “Does anyone need to be doing this useless task?”
Start delegating to the rest of the family. Teach your children to do their own laundry and pack their own school lunches. Have your spouse take over some of the daily chores. Ask your neighbor if they’d like to take turns dropping the kids off at school. Hire professionals to clean your home or mow your lawn. There are so many ways to get help, but you’ll never get that help if you don’t ask (or in some cases demand it).
Don’t Do Things You Hate
Obligation and guilt are not good enough reasons to do something. Of course, there are certain things you can’t get out of like going to school or paying your bills. However, it is possible to stop over scheduling yourself.
If you don’t enjoy going to your monthly networking group find other ways to connect with colleagues. If you don’t love volunteering for every event at your child’s school you are allowed to say “No, thank you.” Be selective about what you put on your schedule. Before you pencil it in ask yourself, “Does this enrich my life in any way?” If the answer is no don’t do it!
Forget About the Mythical Perfect Life
Perfection is unachievable! You are only setting yourself up for frustration and failure. Being perfectly flawed is so much more interesting. Do what you can, when you can then move onto something more important like enjoying your family and friends. Letting go of perfection is so freeing!
Releasing unrealistic expectations from your life is a great first step in getting rid of the messy stress. You may notice your home and your schedule start feeling less cluttered. You may even have more energy (yay!). Don’t get hung up on all the things you think you should be doing. Start thinking about a few things you want to stop doing. And good news: You don’t need permission!